I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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