omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
