Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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