worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
