wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Randomize
