vagina is talking i cant
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Your penis caused this!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
