Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
You left your phone here
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