question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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