So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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