All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
