guys are not supposed to queef...right?
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
NoShamevember. You game?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Randomize
