At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Randomize
