I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize