Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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