If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We had sex on a dog bed..
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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