i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
