Have you finally orgasmed yet?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
