And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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