well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize