Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
