the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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