I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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