How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
