Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
