If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
