Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
So here I am, sexting at work.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
