I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
