remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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