I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
