OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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