I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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