eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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