Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
