so that wasnt chicken after all
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize