didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
