Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
