I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
