he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize