no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
