in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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