Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
