She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
