i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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