I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize