Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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