Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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