There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Randomize