he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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