If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
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