Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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